Jokes for the Week of 08/30/20 – 09/05/20
Here are the jokes of the week! Written by me, Bri Ribalta!
1). 23 year old activist, Agnes Chow, is more like Mulan than the actress who played the Chinese warrior fighting against oppression but in real life supports Hong Kong police’s brutality. Seems like this movie’s sequel is just writing itself & we can skip the fillers in the 1st movie.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3lORSBz
Article: https://bbc.in/3bshiQy
2). GWU professor Jessica Krug confesses that she’s been falsely identifying as a black latina. She’s really a white Jewish lady from Kansas who now wants the luxury of calling the cops without getting shot.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3i12RFR
Medium article: https://bit.ly/2EPf7uN
YT Video as Jess La Bonbalera: https://bit.ly/3hUOiDD
3). A Nebraska man went to the Lincoln City Council to ask that boneless chicken wings change their name because they are not really wings. I laughed until I found out he’s a chemical engineer, and realized that this is what keeps him up at night.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/2Z518Yu
YT Video of speech: https://bit.ly/2DyuMxU
4). The FBI is still investigating the sightings of a guy in jetpack that flew past a jet landing at LAX. People are joking it was Elon Musk, I disagree – clearly jetpack guy wanted attention and we all know Must wouldn’t want everyone talking about him.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3bsaliB
Article: https://lat.ms/3h1Uict
5). The Mississippi commission replaced the confederate symbol on its state flag with a white magnolia flower. In November, voters will decide if a magnolia is enough to redeem themselves.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/2QUkuen
Article: https://bit.ly/3h4wkgx
6). So Nancy Pelosi got her hair did without a mask and the salon owner snitched to Fox. If this had happened a week earlier, that salon owner would have been a speaker at the RNC.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3lPUqzs
Article: https://bit.ly/2R8zHJb
YT video: https://bit.ly/3h4y1KV
7). Trump said that he wouldn’t meet with Jacob Blake’s family because they wanted attorneys to listen in and he thought that was inappropriate. More like it’s not his style since he prefers to spit out the lies publicly.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3jN0OFP
Article: https://cnn.it/2QYR52A
8). Michigan teen missing for five weeks walks into a police station to ‘end drama’. No one was happier to see him than the police, who can now close the case under white male temper tantrum.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3hZDyE3
Article: https://bit.ly/2EPRm5S
9). A Colorado woman shot her neighbor multiple times during an argument over the victim’s parenting. To me the argument was a draw, but at least we know who shouldn’t be raising kids.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3585bqH
Article: https://bit.ly/2GvU5BP
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