Here are the jokes of the week! Written by me, Bri Ribalta!
1). Apparently Lindsey Graham said on Fox News that systemic racism doesn’t exist in
America, but I couldn’t hear him clearly because his hood was muffling his voice.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3noAbds
Article: https://bit.ly/3vcPSXE
2). Elon Musk is only hosting SNL because producers couldn’t pronounce X Æ A-12 when
they called to book the baby.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3aWgZif
Article: https://nyti.ms/2RUREyg
3). Disney World should be ashamed of itself for it’s wokeness ruining the experience of a
40+ year old Disney fan. Readers of the man’s opinion piece had to endure over 20
spontaneous vocal outbursts of “total loser” before getting halfway through the article.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3aBAJre
Article: https://bit.ly/2QY2keW
4). A UK teacher who got drunk and took students to a strip club during a trip to Costa Rica
was banned from teaching for three years. After three years he can apply for the ban to
be lifted and both parties can pretend like he’s “cured.”
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3vjIgTn
Article: https://bbc.in/3aClWMK
5). Two intruders broke into a Denny’s in the middle of the night and made eggs. I blame
this Denny’s for not being open 24 hours like other more considerate Denny’s.
Tweet:https://bit.ly/3vj0zrU
Article:https://bit.ly/2S5Dzyb
6). Georgia lawmakers are pushing a bill that would make daylight-saving time permanent
so criminals will have “one less hour in the evening to commit their crimes.” That’s an
interesting way to find out that criminals in Georgia are actually vampires.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3gA6DrP
Article: https://yhoo.it/3sO72t3
7). Scientists find new evidence linking essential oils to seizures, meaning that essential oils
actually do something.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/32Nievw
Article: https://bit.ly/3vcOTGW
8). No recent reports of Major Biden biting anyone else have been made, which means that
people are finally behaving in the White House and the stench of death must be gone.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3gEzYkI
