Here are the jokes of the week! Written by me, Bri Ribalta!
1). This week has proved that a large number of Americans were right in denouncing that Hillary Clinton was too emotional to be president of the United States. With a 232 to 197 vote to impeach, Clinton became the first president in U.S. history to be impeached twice.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3bJ9EUn
Article: http://bit.ly/3stOSxH
2). The NRA has filed for bankruptcy in New York and plans to take their tax-exempt angel of death indoctrination to Texas. Texas governor, Greg Abbott, wasted no time in posting the NRA love note with the news on Twitter. Abbot’s wife must be glad he finally got a Valentine!
Tweet: https://bit.ly/2LSmGUv
Article: http://wapo.st/39FJbUO
3). The attorneys of California inmates are urging Governor Newsom to move inmates to the front of the Covid-19 vaccine line. If you ever wanted to commit a crime that would land you in the slammer this is definitely the year to do it.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3qnGQVp
4). Tuesday was Trump counselor, Hope Hicks’, last day at the White House. Needless to say, a Twitterless raging Trump is now running around with wrinkled pants.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/2LSmGUv
Article: http://cnn.it/2LB5rr3
5). Ahead of the inauguration, several airlines have banned travelers, except for law enforcement, from checking in firearms on DC bound flights. No word yet on whether TSA will also ban travelers from getting through security with firearms.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3nNXn3h
Article: http://bit.ly/3bK6m2U
6). Australia is planning to kill a pigeon that crossed the Pacific Ocean from Oregon. I’m pretty certain the pigeon’s asylum application wasn’t even reviewed. A clear violation of animal rights.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/2XH0boi
7). Lindsey Graham went on Hannity this week and blew the lid on the Left’s agenda. Right after Trump’s impeachment and conviction, we’re moving to impeach George Washington for owning slaves.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3p1fUKE
8). Whole Foods cuts some of their employees’ 15-minute breaks to 10 minutes. Their CEO Mackey is definitely targeting the root of the problem, people who purposely keep getting tired.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/39zNAsp
Article: http://bit.ly/3oKuUN0
9). Former Olympian, Klete Keller was identified by his coach and former teammates as one of the rioters who stormed the Capitol, he was wearing his Olympic Team USA jacket. How the world turns, he was once a prodigious five-time medal winner and now he only owns one jacket.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3qnU0lh
10). Kim Jong Un has given himself the highest title one can hold in North Korea, while demoting his sister and removing her from the party’s top decision-making body. His coming back to life celebration is as elaborate as who un-retire after two weeks with a multi million dollar deal.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3bG0Xdr
11). U.S. Postal Service will temporarily remove some mailboxes in L.A. as a security precaution ahead of the presidential inauguration. Well, its back to sending emails like it’s 2004.
Tweet: https://bit.ly/3suITc3
Article: http://lat.ms/3oJYrXb
